Soundtrack: "Shoorah Shoorah" by
Betty Wright

I did the door for Smiths Night this week. It was freezing outside but
I barely felt it because I
was drunk with power! Mwah ha ha! Still, I felt bad turning people
away. I
am cursed with
niceness. It's a terrible affliction. Actually, the only people I
turned away were the
ones that were
like "Morrissey who?" I mean, why come to a party you don't even know
anything about?
It's
only fair to let the real fans in first.
Also, I probably shouldn't do this, but here's a tip: name-drop. But
name-drop the right person!
One guy, when I asked him whose party he was there for, goes, "Uh,
Andrea Rosen?" Hmm.
Sure, her art gallery's cool and all, but huh?
Well, if you didn't get in, don't blame me-- blame Lindsey freakin'
Lohan and Kate flippin' Moss
for showing up the other week. Thanks for ruining our fun little
party, bitches!
This picture of me is jacked from Patrick's site.
Cross-reference
here for his biting critique of my door-whore skills...

And here's my critique of Patrick's bootleg Belle & Sebastian
t-shirt:
It sucks because it isn't MINE!

Here's Merks doing an impression of all the people outside yelling at
me to let them in.

Lesley and Winnie and their hot miniskirt action.
Hey: Click
here for Lesley's exciting foray into photo-blogging, including a
picture of me
with a cop named "Sniper."

A few weeks ago I thought I saw Kate walking towards me on the street
so I waved a big hello and
she waved back but then when I got closer I realized it wasn't Kate, it
was Jenny Lewis! They're total
twins. Nice of Jenny to wave to a stranger though, isn't it?

Rich stood outside and laughed at me while I was trying to be
intimidating. I don't blame him--
How intimidating could I possibly be while wearing a hat with rainbow
pompoms on it? Next time I'm
wearing all leather and carrying a clipboard. Clipboards are
intimidating!

Sorry, private party.